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Theatre

I love movies!

As a result, I see quite a few of them. Forget traditional ratings — though I usually see grown-up movies, I'll let you know when it's okay to take the kids (and what might change your mind about it). As you might expect, I'll also tell you about any political implications whether subtle or otherwise in a given film. You'll get new theatrical release reviews as well as video reviews here, and in a variety of categories.

Although I started writing movie reviews in large party because I've found too many "real" critics tend to dislike the movies that are the most unadulterated entertainment (in fact, my reviews consider the "fun factor" along witih acting caliber or plot complexities and the like), there's another reason movies have become even more important: propaganda, and the political activism of certain stars. I'll do my best to take note of those things for you as well.


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Theatrical Releases

The Men Who Stare at Goats 1 star rating

2012 3 stars rating WARNING: Mild spoilers

DVD Releases

No DVD reviews this week.

 

 

The Men Who Stare at Goats

Rated: R
Runtime: 94 minutes

The Men Who Stare at GoatsI like George Clooney. I like comedies. I also needed a movie to see. It seemed natural, despite having the year's single most inexplicable title, I'd buy a ticket to see The Men Who Stare at Goats. Sadly, the title may have been the best thing about this movie.

Bob Wilton (Ewan McGregor, displaying an almost flawless American accent) is a frustrated reporter for a small town newspaper. Despite fighting to be assigned to more serious stories, Bob is sent to interview yet another nut for still one more fluff piece. His wife (Rebecca Mader), who also works for the newspaper, is his only real joy in life. But when his wife leaves him for the least likely of characters, Bob throws caution to the wind and heads for Iraq in search of some real news.

Unfortunately, his adventures in Iraq prove less than exciting. Until, that is, he overhears something in a bar that leads him to believe the nut he interviewed earlier might not have been so crazy after all. As Bob tries to learn more, he targets Lyn Cassady (George Clooney) for information. Cassady seems to Bob to be a character in his own right, but not one that has much credibility or who is likely to prove of much use in furthering Bob's own goals. But Cassady does offer Bob a way to get closer to the war action, and so he's able to take advantage of at least that much.

On their way across the desert, Lyn talks and Bob listens. He tells stories of a hippie Army commander (Jeff Bridges) who works with a group of soldiers sponsored by a somewhat off kilter general (Stephen Lang). He describes events Bob can scarcely credit, including the tale of a man (Kevin Spacey) whose abilities prove his undoing. And there's more! Of course, the men are in a war zone and things can't stay quiet enough for stories indefinitely...

I still like George Clooney, and he does a credible job here. Ewan McGregor is a little wide-eyed, but I bought into his character, too. Jeff Bridges is good as is Kevin Spacey, but I really loved Stephen Lang's General Hopgood. The supporting cast, including a mildly amusing appearance by Robert Patrick (of Terminator 2 fame), is also fine.

So what's really wrong with The Men Who Stare at Goats? The script. Penned by Peter Straughan and based on the book by Jon Ronson (which I have not read), the premise is terrific. The fact that there's some basis in truth makes the notion more titillating and the potential for comedy that much greater. And yet it's quite simply not realized. When a movie billed as a comedy isn't funny (despite having one or two laugh-out-loud moments, the film is on balance mundane at best), you've got a pretty obvious problem as far as I'm concerned!

Other more peripheral problems include what appear to me to be budgetary issues. For example, flashbacks showing a young George Clooney show instead a middle aged George Clooney wearing a wig. Now if Brad Pitt can look so flawlessly youthful as Benjamin Button, why on earth can't somebody take 20 years off Clooney? Special effects (most notably one late in the film, though there are others) appear rudimentary and are certainly unbelievable. These things also took away from any enjoyment I might have otherwise had in this film.

BOTTOM LINE: The Men Who Stare at Goats had possibilities. None of them were realized. I frankly can't recommend you bother.

POLITICAL NOTES: There were any number of people and situations that could be interpreted as offensive to the military. I won't go so far as to suggest that that was intentional since I suspect it was a ham-handed (and unfunny) attempt at humor. But one thing I can't let go is the overall disrespect for the mainstream military on exhibit here.

FAMILY SUITABILITY: The Men Who Stare at Goats is rated R for language, some drug content and brief nudity. The rating might be a little harsh, but I wouldn't bring my kids anyway. Actually, the truth is, if I'd known then what I know now, I wouldn't go myself.

 

2012

Rated: PG-13
Runtime: 158 minutes

2012Every year, there's at least one big studio, big budget movie that features high end special effects. Will the movie's story or actors be any good? Doesn't matter, because the special effects will be awesome! That's exactly what I was thinking when I saw this summer's Transformers sequel, and I was wrong. The movie, despite its superlative effects, was bad enough that it did matter. But that's okay; hope springs eternal, and I used the same argument as my excuse to see 2012. Fortunately, this time around I wasn't disappointed.

Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor) is a government scientist who travels to India when a fellow scientist tells him there's something there he must see. Helmsley is floored by the data revealed and he rushes back to Washington where he promptly advises his boss we—the whole earth—have a problem. Helmsley's boss, Carl Anheuser (Oliver Platt) recognizes the importance of what he's told and promptly takes Helmsley directly to President Thomas Wilson (Danny Glover) himself. Big decisions are quickly made and secretly set in motion. Meanwhile...

Jackson Curtis (John Cusack) is an unsuccessful novelist who pays the bills as the chauffer of a wealthy Russian businessman. But at the moment, he's far more concerned with picking up his children from his ex-wife (Amanda Peet) and her new husband (Tom McCarthy) for a trip to Yellowstone National Park, something it's all too clear the kids don't want to do.

Once at the park, Jackson tries to hike with his children to a spot much loved by him and his ex-wife. He arrives where his memory tells him he should be, but things look different, and the area is literally crawling with scientists and soldiers. Among those at the government enclave is Adrian Helmsley. After a brief conversation and a warning, Jackson and the kids are released. They've set up an uncomfortable camp and the kids are complaining about mosquitoes when Jackson hears something in the woods that turns out to be local conspiracy theorist, Charlie Frost (Woody Harrelson). After sharing a beer or two with the man, Jackson escapes back to his own camp and his disgruntled children.

Jackson's vacation is suddenly cut short, though, when he gets a call from his ex-wife asking him to bring the children home. A spate of earthquake activity in California has her spooked, and she wants the kids at her side. Jackson does as she asks, but his mind is starting to spin and he tries to connect the dots between all of the odd things that have happened and that he's learned over the course of the last few days. Of course, it's right about then that all hell breaks loose.

John Cusack isn't, by any stretch, my favorite action actor. But he was oddly perfectly cast in this action movie. He somehow has the ability to play "everyman" onscreen which makes us all relate more closely to him no matter the extremities of the circumstances in which he finds himself. Chiwetel Ejiofor, Amanda Peet, and Thandie Newton (as the president's daughter) are also just fine (although I did find the supporting roles of a Russian businessman and his mistress to be caricatures). But the scene stealers here are Woody Harrelson (nobody can do the lunatic better), and Oliver Platt. In particular, it's impossible not to loathe Platt even as part of you secretly not only understands what he's doing but even approves just the tiniest bit.

2012 was directed and co-written by Roland Emmerich. Despite his reputation as an action film director, his history is a little uneven. Yes, we can credit him with The Patriot, but he also directed 10,000 BC. Yes, he wrote and directed the wonderful Independence Day, but did I mention 10,000 BC? 2012 fortunately puts Emmerich back on the positive side of movie-making once again where he does a credible job both writing and helming the film.

As you might expect from the trailers, the special effects are superlative. There are a couple of moments (if you blink, you'll probably miss them) where you can see the handiwork of a computer programmer, but the remaining 99.9% of the effects are utterly fantastic. To me, the only real shortcoming involves the science. You probably already know that 2012 is the year in which the Mayan calendar supposedly comes to an end, and that there are some who believe that signals the end of everything (the reality is that 2012 ends the Mayan calendar cycle just December 31 ends ours—it just starts over again once it's done). I'll buy into that for the sake of a movie, but the actual cause of the end of the world as explained here won't pass the giggle test with any physicist or geologist, nor even with a layman who has a bit of an amateur interest in both, like me. And don't even get me started on the speed of the results of those suppositions! I frankly found that distracting. But only for a second!

BOTTOM LINE: 2012 is about 2 and a half hours long, and I was stunned at how quickly time passed.That might have had something to do with the fact that I spent most of my time in the theatre trying to relax all of the muscles I kept tensing as I watched the action unfold in front of me. Forget all of the other things you might consider before you decide on a movie, and tell me this: Isn't that really why you go?

POLITICAL NOTES: Do I believe that the government would keep things, even deadly serious things, a secret from its citizens? Oh, yeah. In fact, I'm pretty sure it does that kind of thing on a regular basis. And did I appreciate the nod in the film to the Communist Chinese as being pretty much the only people that could have accomplished what they did as quickly as they did? Sure, largely because it's the truth. I also found it bizarrely believable when I was confronted with the methodology the government chose to determine who would go where and when. I can't go into detail here without spoiling certain things for those who haven't yet seen the film, but suffice it to say that not all of these things are good things.

FAMILY SUITABILITY: 2012 is rated PG-13 for intense disaster sequences and some language. I'd have to agree with that rating, and add one more limitation of my own for the younger set: Remember that lengthy run time!